How do i escape a victim mentality?
2017... After my recent return from Peru, I have been experiencing night terrors about a dear loved one. In the dreams, I share the most profound emotional pain I have ever experienced through past relationships with the feminine. I was screaming for help and being completely ignored, used, and manipulated. The dreams usually end up with the most extreme rage I have ever felt, and I will wake up violently, jolting and shaking. These dreams, as though they are sucking my energy away, have been terrifying and draining.
I have had many similar dreams, and my old response to these dreams was to decipher them literally and run away. After reaching out for advice about dreams, finding out that in most situations, they are just symbols of the unconscious mind, and not to take them so literally. I began to dig deeper into my past and how these might represent my past relationships with other females. Being emotionally objective helped me to have a higher perspective of these dreams and to be grateful for them and how they might be helping me to process deep emotional wounds that my conscious mind can't quite reach down to feel. I am so grateful for all of my experiences that lead me to experience these wounds. I am also very thankful to this loved one for helping me to process and support me through this process.
We all, on occasion, fall into a mindset of being a victim, especially when in relationships. What has helped me to process and escape this victim mindset is realizing that any projection or judgment we hold for others is just a reflection of the unloved parts of ourselves. I must always look inward first when experiencing or questioning any intense moments in life. It is also necessary for me to realize that it is not my fault the other way people behave and to know that I am only responsible for my thoughts, emotions, and behavior. I need to give myself space and time to feel into and process moments like this, or I will forever be distracting myself from my truth. I can then be around and process this with friends and family rather than completely dumping it on them.
As a man, I have struggled with asking for help when needed and being genuinely open and honest with myself and all my relationships. Asking for help is not comfortable or easy, but speaking up and being honest and vulnerable at any moment has been rewarding. Taking steps towards genuinely believing you are worthy of love through setting boundaries, etc., you will be seen and heard by the universe, and she will reward you tenfold. These are the steps I take toward escaping victimhood, taking accountability, being objective, being curious, and taking time to decipher why I am feeling a certain way or experiencing life happenings. I am sending so much love and prayers to all during these recovery times. I hope someone finds some introspection into their own life through my shares.
